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Viggo's Love
Topic Started: 15 Feb 2017, 18:23 (3865 Views)
Tuffnut'sChicken
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B-BAWK!

Viggo's Love
Inspired by comments on articles, Viggo fangirls, and Mildew fangirls.

“Are you sure this will work?” Astrid asked.
“It has to. We can’t keep going like this. We need to capture him somehow.”
Astrid sighed. “Okay, let’s do this.”
The Twins had Barf and Belch send up a giant puff of fire, the signal to the other vikings to bring the trap.
The Dragon Rider swooped in close, circling around the tent. Fishlegs hovered on Meatlug over to the top of the tent, ripping the top off with his knife.
“Hookfang, light ‘er up!” Snotlout cried. Hookfang lit his body on fire, and the pair swept close to the walls of the tent, lighting them up in a blaze.
“Now!” Hiccup called. The Riders landed in the circle of flames. Viggo was surrounded by dragons and by fire.
“Quite impressive,” he congratulated Hiccup. “Now, I suppose you think you’ve captured me.”
“There’s no way to escape,” Hiccup said. “Give it up, Viggo!”
“Ah, my dear boy,” Viggo began, as he reached for his sword. “I’m afraid I must leave now.” He grabbed his sword and began to expertly keep the dragons dodging around. Viggo knew their exact blind spots and their exact weaknesses. Although he could never hope to cut his way through a circle of dragons, he was confident that given a few minutes, he could make a path out. Although he preferred to use pure cunning, he was perfectly comfortable with fighting should that be the best course of action. “However,” he murmured, “there might be a better way.”
His scheming was interrupted by the arrival of a large party of vikings carrying a large steal cage and some nets. They stopped just behind the line of fire and dragons. They readied their nets and they put down the cage. It was obvious now that he couldn’t fight his way out, but… Viggo’s eyes went wide. That man. That man!
Mildew was holding up the back corner of the heavy cage. They lowered the cage to the ground slowly, grunting as they did so.
Once it was completely on the ground, Mildew straightened up, wiping the sweat from his brow. From Viggo’s perspective, Mildew was framed by the flames. His slight frame was outlined by the raging fire; his scruffy white facial hair was tinted orange. The waves of heat made his face quiver.
Viggo’s face slowly melted into an awestruck look. The slight scowl went away, replaced by a gaped-open mouth. His eyes opened wide. The wind blew some fire around Viggo’s body on either side, clearing a path to Mildew. His short hair blowing backwards, Viggo slowly stepped forward.
“I… I didn’t know… people could look like that,” Viggo breathed. “I didn’t know!” He saw the vikings preparing to throw a net over him. “Take me!” he cried, dropping his sword and stretching his arms out. “Only keep me near this beautiful man!”
On Stormfly, Astrid tried not to vomit. “Ew!” she said.
“Get him!” Hiccup yelled. The vikings threw the net over Viggo.
The net flew over Viggo’s head. Viggo didn’t retaliate. Instead, he just smiled. “Now I get to be near old-smellypants,” he gushed. “Oh, I’m so sorry for all the trouble I caused. I was just desperate to find someone so wonderful as this man. His eyes, his hair, his scrawny muscles! I just can’t believe that he exists! Now we can be together, old man!”
Mildew just backed off a step and the other vikings put Viggo into the cage. The Dragon Riders fastened some chains to the cage so their dragons could carry it back to the dungeon.
“Let’s go,” Hiccup said, as the vikings stared at Viggo in a mixture of horror and disgust. Mildew started to follow the other vikings onto the ships as the Riders prepared to take off.
“Wait!” Viggo cried. “I want to see my darling on the flight!”
“No, Mildew, keep away from here,” Astrid called. “I might just be sick if he keeps it up!”
“Alright, then, I’ll just pass the time singing about him,” Viggo said. He cleared his throat and began singing:
“Oh, what do you do when the chips are down,
When your time is running out?
You open your heart and let this great man in,
The man who smells like cabbages!
Wonderful man who smells like cabbages!
I love the man who smells like cabbages!”
“Stop!” Astrid called. “Mildew, I think you’d better come with us to make him stop singing!”
“Do I have to?” Mildew asked. Astrid patted Stormfly. Stormfly flicked her tail and a spine landed two inches from Mildew’s foot.
“I’m coming, I’m coming,” Mildew grumbled. He climbed onto the top of the cage to ride back.
The dragons took off. Throughout the whole flight back to Berk, Viggo sat nicely at the bottom of his cage, grinning and staring up at Mildew. He would occasional murmur, “Such a beautiful man!”
After many, many hours of that, they finally landed at Berk. “Alright, let’s get him locked up in the guardhouse until we figure out what to do with him,” Hiccup instructed. Several large vikings escorted Viggo into the guardhouse.
“You’ll visit me, right?” Viggo asked Mildew. “You’ll visit me! Please visit me! And send me a picture!”
Mildew shuddered and ran the other way.
“Darling! Come back!” Viggo shouted. Then he smiled. “Isn’t he so cute when he runs?”
He was locked away in the cage and two large vikings were set as guards. All that night, Hiccup rested, getting ready for the trial in the morning.
Bright and early, Hiccup walked down to the guardhouse again.
Astrid ran out to meet him. “Hiccup, you’ve got to see this! Come on!”
She grabbed Hiccup’s hand and practically dragged him into the guardhouse. Inside, Hiccup saw a small crowd gathered around the unconscious guards, the cell’s door hanging ajar. Hiccup rushed inside. Viggo was nowhere in sight. A note was left on the chair. Hiccup picked it up and read it.
“‘My fine friend,’” he read, “‘you are far too gullible. You almost had me, but your disgust got in your way of seeing my true motivations. I trust we shall meet again. Farewell.”
This adventure strengthened Hiccup. He learned a few things from Viggo… things he would use again in the future. However, it is very safe to assume that Hiccup never fangirled over Mildew.

See, people? That's the danger of fangirling!
Clouds of corn <3
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Heather the Berserker
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I go where no one goes

Bear the flame
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BioLilyDraws
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Aphmau is the best!

Ugh.....I'm like Astrid right now
"You can kill me once, but you can't kill me twice." - Luna Rainclaw
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Tuffnut'sChicken
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B-BAWK!

Heather the Berserker
16 Feb 2017, 01:25
I know, right? That's what I was doing the whole time I was writing it!
LunaTheNightWing
16 Feb 2017, 02:23
Ugh.....I'm like Astrid right now
Well, that's great! It's great being like Astrid, right?
I mean, maybe not when it comes to feeling nauseated, but, y'know, normally. :P
Clouds of corn <3
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Watercressed Lunatic
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I do not want a world without Toothless...

sooo disturbing XD
"One of the most beautiful qualities of friendship is to understand and be understood."
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Zira Shadow
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Skrill

This is the most beautifully disgusting thing yet.(I would say ever but I know you, Chicken...you would take that as a dare)
Sister in arms of the forgotten disaster branch, Saturn Starlings
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Tuffnut'sChicken
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B-BAWK!

Hiccup's Windwalker in Berk
18 Feb 2017, 04:16
sooo disturbing XD
Isn't it, though? <3 :P
Zira Shadow
25 Feb 2017, 19:58
This is the most beautifully disgusting thing yet.(I would say ever but I know you, Chicken...you would take that as a dare)
Yes, I would. You know me altogether too well.
Clouds of corn <3
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